NEW ORLEANS, LA - Residents of Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama and Florida are frankly a little sick and tired of hearing everyone freak out about Hurricane Florence and her endless assault of never ending rain on North and South Carolina. Several disgruntled members of the Gulf states reckon it isn't fair and they are due for their own storm.
"Now you tell me how else am I gonna get me both CNN, fake news liberal media, and Fox News, which is trusted fair and balanced because the President, MAGA baby, tells me so, to come down here and give a shit about me unless I'm neck deep in flood water," asked concerned resident of Mandeville, Louisiana Brittney Gautier.
"It just ain't fair. Hurricanes and flooding are all we got down here. Not fair for states that actually matter to be taking all we got. The damn hurricane ain't even no hurricane no more, it's a tropical storm or it's depressed or something."
Echoing her concerns or other deep South residents are pissed off they haven't had a Katrina like storm in ages, causing the nation to collectively ignore the Gulf states until something interesting happens in them or a storm hits, whichever happens first.