SAN DIEGO, CA - Local salesman Alan Peterson is a fashion icon at his office but with great achievement, it comes at the cost of a great sacrifice. His coworkers couldn't seem to grasp the concept of the knit neck tie he wore a last Monday.
"What's that supposed to be? A sock?"
"Looks like someone snipped off the tip of your tie pal."
"Is that a cock sock?"
The taunts and questions were relentless. Peterson couldn't spend anytime enjoying idle conversation at the water cooler discussing politics or what happened last night on Game of Thrones, he had to constantly educate his coworkers that his tie was indeed a real thing, called a knit tie, worn by people such as President John F. Kennedy, Sean Connery, Leonardo DiCaprio, Daniel Craig and a multitude of others.
Apparently the fashion design was too Hollywood and far too much for the average worker to handle as their entire lives were consumed with the existence of the neck wear. Peterson is expected to cause a mass panic when he voluntarily wears suspenders to work next Thursday.